A Nightmare on Jay Street

I awoke from another nightmare. Last night I quickly fell asleep. Next thing you know I’m shaking, grabbing my fiancee for dear life. This nightmare consisted of a home invasion. Someone came into my house. And a great friend of mine was there to protect me, fighting for his life. There were guns drawn on both ends. You would swear this was an action movie. But this whole scenario was drawn from past traumas. It’s been a while since I had a dream like this. I even spoke of these dreams several times in therapy. They were addressed and dealt with, or so I thought. But suddenly they're back. What do I do now?

These dreams are getting more vivid as the days go by. This isn’t the first time I had a nightmare like this. But I could see this dream much clearer. They say you can’t outrun your past. And some say healing is a lifelong process. These make me think of how life always has its challenges, no matter where in life you are. I’d witnessed the threat of violence for a long time as a kid. I might have met a few trained assassins. Now trauma has resurfaced in my dreams, despite the fact that my life today is nothing like the past.

One conclusion that arose from my therapy sessions was that I was a scared little boy in my childhood. Fear was always present in me. But I never got to embrace this fear. I was constantly running away from it. Honestly, I wish I had defended myself in my recent nightmare. I want to be brave and strong. Maybe that's why I never embraced my fears. I didn't think they were acceptable. Now in 2025 I'm learning to accept the scared little boy within.